Posted in video on September 23rd, 2018 by Jin Wicked – Comments Off on [VIDEO BLOG] FALL COMICON

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Update: As of the following morning, I have reached 100 Patrons! THANK YOU SO MUCH! I can’t wait to start chipping away at the Lunch Break archive!

Also, in my opinion this is one of the funniest things I have ever made.

Jin Wicked is Sick of Shit, Vol 2

Posted in love on September 19th, 2018 by Jin Wicked – Comments Off on Jin Wicked is Sick of Shit, Vol 2

There is somehow, simultaneously, a lot going on at the moment, and a lot of nothing. I was reminded earlier this week of the need to choose your words carefully when I received a phone call the purpose of which, I am not sure. It seemed designed solely to anger and provoke me. I told this person I was drawing, but they insisted on interrupting me repeatedly, anyway. Inebriated rehashing and reheating of an incident that occurred earlier that day, and the rambling confessions that they knew deep down they would never keep their promises to me. Making flimsy excuses for how they had taken advantage of my forgiving nature and generosity, repeatedly, over and over… I could go on. Admitting you are a shitheel does not absolve you of your responsibility to do something about being a shitheel. And fuck, don’t then double-down on it.

But I remember, not that long ago, being the aggrieved and wounded party, grasping at straws desperately trying to justify both the incredible pain I felt, and lessen the guilt of the pain I had caused. I remember, so I listened.

“The thing I hated most about you — couldn’t stand about you, I think — but also had a lot of pride in, is that you are smarter than me.”

It is well-documented that many men struggle with intelligent and successful women. But here is the thing — your insecurity is not my responsibility to fix. Your insecurity is not a license to tear me down in front of mutual friends. It is not a license to act at times as if I do not exist in public or on social media. It is not a license to diminish the importance, value, or skill of my work. It is not a license to repay my debts last, disrespect my time, and treat me like one of your lowest priorities. It is not a license to criticize the efficient lifestyle I have created for myself. And if you care more about being perceived by others as a “fanboy” than visibly and vocally supporting the dreams of someone you claim to love, that’s your insecurity and your problem. I have to believe that there’s someone out there brave and bold enough to (however badly) sing together with me from the rooftops. If not, then I continue this journey alone.

My purpose is not to be your self-esteem booster, arm candy, trophy partner, salve for a wounded ego, or a proof of virility during your midlife crisis. I want an equal. I work harder than anyone I personally know. I am working eleven hour days at my day job (really), so that I can free more whole days for binge working on my art, comics, and other projects, and still sustain a certain level of income. I monitor every calorie going into my mouth and give up about six hours to the gym every week because I care about being healthy and looking my best. I relentlessly promote my work seven days a week in every venue I can find to be successful. I acknowledge my faults and work to address them. I have spent the past three years working on my own issues, anxieties, and insecurities, and I have no desire to go back. Resting on my laurels is not a thing that I do. There are always bigger fish to fry and steeper mountains to climb. If my accomplishments, growth, or success intimidate or threaten you, that is your insecurity to deal with. It is not a license to treat me poorly.

I say all this in the context of multiple relationships, throughout my life.

By all but the most conservative definitions, I am a Good Woman. I am caring, affectionate, compassionate, generous to a fault, honest, and loyal. I do not drink, do not use drugs, do not party, do not stay out late, and I will always let you know where I am, and who I am with. I pay attention. I will remember all your preferences and do things without having to be asked. I do not care how much money you make, as long as you pull your weight, and you work. I do not care about fancy houses, cars, or status symbols. I do not care about material things much, at all. Be able to make me laugh. Match my effort, clean up after yourself, and work to keep up with me. Really simple, but keeping up with me is not for the faint of heart. My vices are being a workaholic, a box of twelve cigarillos every few months, and bitching about television.

I feel like a fool. I feel like a fool for seeing the best in people. I feel like a fool for believing. I am tired. I am tired of crying. I am tired of meaningless words and broken promises. I am tired of my male “friends” who conveniently turn a blind eye and sweep it under the rug when it is their “bro” doing something wrong to a woman. I am tired of hearing “I want to help you,” and “I want to protect you,” from people who end up doing precisely the opposite.

I am tired of fighting to prevent the hardening of my heart.


Posted in video on September 16th, 2018 by Jin Wicked – Comments Off on [VIDEO BLOG] EXCIIIIITED

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Posted in work on September 12th, 2018 by Jin Wicked – Comments Off on Jenny

Allow me to tell you the story, now, of a fiercely defiant, individualistic, and a stubborn little girl. A little asshole. A girl that lived slightly out of sync with the rest of the world, ground down into a deep depression over the years by the expectations, judgement, and disappointments of family and society at large. Allow me to tell you the true story of the curious, wonderful, and often painful life this girl lived, until one fine day, she woke up with a purpose and shouted at the sky, “I don’t give a flying fuck if you think I’m an asshole anymore!”

And on that day, the little asshole earned her crown.

Chess Queen, Wikipedia

After much toiling, sacrifices, and about thirty hours of crushing work, the first real page of Queen of Assholes is complete. I am looking forward to showing my chops as a more dramatic writer and storyteller. Queen is the combination and culmination of everything I have worked toward for most of my life.

I am working twelve and fourteen hour days, almost seven days a week, to build the necessary finances and momentum to see this through to success. The pages will finish faster as the full-page format grows more intuitive with experience. The introduction is somewhat self-contained (a sort of “mission statement” piece) and I plan to self-publish that as a magazine-sized floppy in the spring of next year. After that, it will be 2-4 years before I can publish a formal Volume One, depending on the speed at which I am able to produce. It will continue to be serialized online as a webcomic. I have, very tentatively, two more videos planned that correspond with parts of the introduction, but they are dependent upon some harder to get footage and rights to music.

I never grew up.

For multiple reasons, this was, emotionally and physically speaking, the most difficult video I have made. Due to the heat, hat, black clothing, and spinning, I got quite sick while filming the ride footage, which was made back in June. I chose to feature some photographs of me as a baby, along with my mother, who passed away in 2010 at the age of only 59. The drawings were made in 1984, at age four, and are the earliest surviving examples of anything I have drawn. They are contrasted against my latest work, where I have continued to push the limits of my artistic and creative abilities. This song is a personal favourite of mine, both for its simplicity, and the dual purpose I have given it here — the struggle to be seen and loved for what I am by my parents, and the desire to eventually find a partner capable of walking alongside me.

My work is lonely work, but it is a Faustian bargain I consciously and willingly made. I am blessed to have a motley crew of caring and supportive friends, without whom what I am doing would be virtually impossible. I am blessed to have some of the most dedicated readers in the world, some having followed me for nearly two decades. It is through your love that I discovered my own strength. It is because of you, that discouragement cannot touch me.

Perhaps someday I will find my King of Assholes.


[VIDEO BLOG] New work and Fall Comicon!

Posted in video on September 9th, 2018 by Jin Wicked – Comments Off on [VIDEO BLOG] New work and Fall Comicon!

Ben R Cooper Photography

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